Dear Miroir Noir,
I've always been curious about sex toys but not really sure what I would like or how to get started with them. What kind of different toys are out there? How the hell do you jump in?
Oh my sweet, sweet BT,
I long for the days before sex toys littered my bedroom floor like a priest’s nightmare. If only my bank account could keep up with my labedo. Sex toys can get expensive, but it is possible to find good options for less money without sacrificing a good ‘gasm.
Now, there are all sorts of sex toys, so I want to break this up into two piece: vaginas and penises. Miroir Noir is my name and satisfaction for everyone is my game.
Let’s start with sex toys designed for vaginal stimulation.
There are plenty of different vibrators, and they can all look increasingly intimidating. Hell, despite my own sexcapades, I’ve stared down an aisle or two scratching my head. I’ll start with my own personal favorite: bullets. Bullets look exactly like their name – small, sometimes round and typically only one to three inches long.
Don’t make the same mistake as me and buy a bullet that requires batteries. One day, you’ll be in bed, your legs tingling as you're almost at take-off, and then BAM! It dies. You scramble around the house only to stare forlornly at your empty battery packet in the trashcan. I recommend spending a little extra and getting a rechargeable bullet.
So what do these babies do? They are used for clitoral stimulation. I never put mine inside me; I just give the ol’ pearl a good whirl.Some of them have 20+ settings, but start small to figure out what you like. You can absolutely go big or go home, but you might not enjoy only clitoral stimulation. That’s when you go for something like....
To vibrate or not to vibrate? That is the question.
Dildos are phallic-shaped and meant to stimulate the G-Spot and the overall vaginal cavity. But, they can go for anal stimulation as well!
Now, dildos are a toy that can be bought cheap the first time. However, cheap doesn’t always mean it won’t cost you some of your time. A lot of dildos are made of silicone which isn’t impossible to clean, but you will have to buy specific toy-cleaning solutions because of their porous nature. If you don’t, you’ll be scrambling around your room attempting to figure out where ‘that smell’ is coming from.
Save yourself some trouble and start off with a cheap glass dildo – very easy to clean, but not as mobile. Always have lubricant on hand when using dildos because unless you’re the Niagara Falls (if you are, high-five!) it might not be so pleasurable, especially the first time. If you fall in love with the glass, then move on to buying an expensive silicone. These are easier for anal play, since they bend.
But, how do we get the best of both worlds?
Rabbits are adorable. I think there is even a Friends episode about one? Anyways, they have a long slender piece meant to be inside the vaginal cavity and an external piece meant to stimulate the clitoris. Essentially: it is a vibrating dildo.
I’d only get this once you’ve realized you enjoy clitoral stimulation as well as internal stimulation. A lot of rabbits seems to do... well... a lot. Some of them have rotating heads that mimic blades on a helicopter. These heads can rapidly stimulate all the walls of your vagina. When buying a rabbit, make sure to take a close look on what you’re getting yourself into. I’ve made the mistake of over-buying. Essentially, I bought the one with the lights, camera and action, but it put up a poor show. I didn’t need all that.
I recommend starting off with a rabbit that has a stationary phallus. Now, rabbits truly are the mistresses of all stimulation. They do everything by vibrating on the clitoris, stimulating the walls, and hitting the G-Spot with their glorious phallic shape. So, I wouldn’t buy one of these until you’ve tried the other two first. If you have both a dildo and a bullet, you can simulate a rabbit yourself. Buy a cock ring that can hold a vibrator. It should have a hole that fits around the phallus and is attached to a hole where you can put your bullet. Put the cockring on your dildo and put your bullet in the cockring. If you like the stimulation, consider buying yourself a rabbit!
All in all, the sex toy arena are massive, but here is a good start. I’ll be continuing this series for a bit because, I can’t forget about the pensies, can I? I’ll be cumming back, I promise!